October 2008 Archives

I have been working a lot lately, mostly on the startup, and I've been running myself a little ragged. Due to this I have been searching for things to help me stay focused and calm, but organized and competent. Two things in particular have greatly helped me:

1. An Assistant. I hired an assistant because I was putting off some of my paperwork and smaller items and procrastinating with getting things done on the business side. My assistant is superawesome. I started her off with only a few hours a month, but I am going to increase her hours as much as she can handle (and as much as I can afford) so that I can have sort of a backup person to remind me of things, stay on top of my pile of bills, etc. My assistant is definitely more than just an assistant though, so I am very lucky to have her on board.

2. Mini Vacations. This past weekend I went to Atlanta for Morehouse/Spelman Homecoming. No, I didn't go to Spelman but I have lots of friends who went to Morehouse and they go to homecoming every year. Anyway, I did the  unthinkable and didn't work for 3 whole days. I just kept an eye on email via my iPhone and had lots and lots of fun. Staying in a nice hotel, renting a car, and inviting your friends to come share in on the fun helped reset my frantic life. I often work 7 days a week, and perhaps something like 15 hours a day. It was very difficult to leave my work behind, but I managed. I think I may plan for something like this every other a month: a trip somewhere either to visit family and friends I haven't seen in a while or to go to a special event. I feel much more focused and refreshed now that I am back, and I didn't break my bank either.

I am still in search of other things to stay healthy and sane, but so far I feel like I am off to a good start. What keeps you balanced?

I'm up late. Thinking about moving.

For the last 18 months I have had this itch to move to New York City. Some days the itch is faint. Other days it's ridiculously strong. I don't have any strong reasons to move to NYC (job, family); my sole motivation is to do it just to see if I can do it. Then move back to California where I will (presumably) get married and have children and raise them in sunny Orange County, preferably Irvine or Newport Beach. If you knew either of these two cities, you might want to barf, as they're pretty much the epitome of Levittown, only with better weather and  Asians. I can't help it though, I grew up in Tustin, and my first job was in Newport Beach. I spent my entire life watching the happy people live their happy little Levittown lives in Irvine and Newport, I guess that was my reference point for The American Dream.

Back to NYC. My ace Boom lives in NYC. Lots of cool people I know and love live in NYC. LA is starting to bore me. Yes, I love the weather. I hate driving. That's a lie, I love to drive. I hate the time spent driving though. I love my New Mexico road trips. I don't like how a NM road trip is the equivalent of a trip to the San Gabriel Valley for me. But I do feel bored here. Social life is almost stifling here.  

I started to look on craigslist for NYC apartments. I can't help but feel like a fish out of water, toying with this idea. I haven't been so off kilter since my first week arriving at MIT back in '99. I remember it so vividly, my first night there. My parents shipped me off to MIT all by my lonesome. My dorm room was so bare and sterile. I was afraid to walk outside by myself at night. I was obsessed with not losing my dorm room keys. It was just me, in this new foreign place. For years I tried to avoid that feeling, but now, I kind of yearn for it again. Newness.

I just may put a plan in motion to move to NYC. Not making any promises. I did move out to LA for A Reason and I have yet to seriously confront that Reason. I have my excuses (work, school, new business), but in reality I have never given it the ole college try. Moving to NYC would mean turning on that idea for now, and so I wonder, do I have the guts to go for what I said I wanted? Do I still want It?

We shall see.

Life is moving along well in the world of running my own business. Between working with my clients, managing the business side of the business, and launching a startup, my schedule is crazy. I have evaded a few panic attacks the past few weeks, which is good because they wouldn't have been worth it. I alternate between obsessing over my checking account balance everyday, and swiping away to my hearts content and forcing myself NOT  to look at my bank account balance for days. There's got to  be a happy medium in there somewhere.

I want to thank all the folks again who come by and send me a sweet email or leave a comment to cheer me on. It seems right when I am almost to a low point (albeit dramatic--I really don't have much to be sad about lol), somebody somewhere says something to put a smile on my face, and I push forward. Thank you.

I have a cold. I need health insurance. I know how to get health insurance. I know how to get affordable health insurance. But I am being silly and want to save that money. I will get my health insurance soon though. SOON. I just have to get my mind right and fill out those forms again. I hate forms. I hate paperwork. So much so, I have $250 free bucks waiting for me. I just have to fill out a form to get it. It's been a month and I still have not filled out the form.

I had to send a fax out of state this week. It cost me something over 5 dollars to send 4 pages over at Kinko's. What the mess? I have two fax/scan/copy machines, but no phone line. I don't think getting a phone line is worth the cost...I've been looking into some electronic faxing solutions. If you know of any, let me know.

Now that I am the master of my own schedule, I have been thinking about going to more conferences to beef up my skills and such. I don't like networking (surprise! It's because I am shy). But I love conferences. So, I am going to SXSWi this year, and I am batting my eyelashes at The Future of Web Apps. I have never been to Miami, either! I just need to get myself one more fat contract and I will sign right up.

I find that I am addicted to work. Doesn't matter which project (a client, the startup, my pet projects), I am just always working working working and getting a little lost in my work. Like, I'll go out on a weekend night, come home at 2 am and then work until 5 am. And  for some reason I cannot sleep past 8 am to save my life. My energy is on a hundred, thousand, trillion! I felt guilty for taking the day off to be sick in bed. I need to watch myself. Good thing I have planned a vacation at the end of the month. Going to ATL (again) to see my best bud as well as one of my line sisters, and have a very non-work filled weekend. I am excited. Of course, I plan to play hard, so that means I'll be working hard up until then. Maybe if I can schedule in weekend getaways every month or so, I will be ok.

Ok, I need to get my day going. I have roughly four hours of meetings today. Fun.